Two nights ago, I dreamed about earthquakes and woke up in a panic.
I think the next 6 months will bring about a lot of change for us. Not "moving-to-Luxemburg" kind of changes. Just changes. Change is stressful. Even the good kind. In anticipation of said 'differentness' (it's not a word. don't try to look it up), Tim and I have started praying every night before we go to bed. We get all cuddly and I touch his forearm gently. He kisses my forehead and I remember when we first started dating and I used to approach him as if he was a map. I used to, as Kent Nerburn would say, try to get to know his edges and the spaces he keeps in his life. I think about how I need to start trying this again. I think about how some edges will always be new. We talk with half air and half our voices and we kiss, as if that is the stamp that will send our envelope of wishes and worries and promises to God.
This praying together thing...it is something we should have started year(s) ago. We are making up for lost time, and every night I go to bed feeling safe and warm like I've just had an entire mug of hot chocolate, no matter what bad dreams I've had the night before.
In other news, I bought a memory foam pillow. It is hard and squishy at the same time, and I think my neck is confused. I wake up feeling like I am in college, crashing on people's floors again. (And my neck tells me I am too old for this nonsense). I am hoping that breaking in a new pillow, like most Important Things in life, just takes time. I am keeping the receipt anyway.
My best to you.