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Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Catching Z's and Praying Prayers

Two nights ago, I dreamed about earthquakes and woke up in a panic.  

     I think the next 6 months will bring about a lot of change for us.  Not "moving-to-Luxemburg" kind of changes. Just changes.  Change is stressful.  Even the good kind.  In anticipation of said 'differentness' (it's not a word. don't try to look it up), Tim and I have started praying every night before we go to bed.  We get all cuddly and I touch his forearm gently.  He kisses my forehead and I remember when we first started dating and I used to approach him as if he was a map.  I used to, as Kent Nerburn would say, try to get to know his edges and the spaces he keeps in his life.  I think about how I need to start trying this again.  I think about how some edges will always be new.  We talk with half air and half our voices and we kiss, as if that is the stamp that will send our envelope of wishes and worries and promises to God.  

     This praying together is something we should have started year(s) ago.  We are making up for lost time, and every night I go to bed feeling safe and warm like I've just had an entire mug of hot chocolate, no matter what bad dreams I've had the night before.   

     In other news, I bought a memory foam pillow.  It is hard and squishy at the same time, and I think my neck is confused.   I wake up feeling like I am in college, crashing on people's floors again.  (And my neck tells me I am too old for this nonsense).  I am hoping that breaking in a new pillow, like most Important Things in life, just takes time.  I am keeping the receipt anyway.  

My best to you.  

Love, H.  


carmen @ life blessons said...

Ohh excited to hear about these changes!! :) Also Michael prays out loud for us before we go to bed, but sometimes I accidentally fall asleep before the end. Then I'll wake up with a start and apologize, "Did I miss the 'Amen'?" It's totally become one of our catchphrases :) Don't be like me and miss the Amens!

Megan Marie said...

I have horrible nightmares unless we say our prayers together before bed. I love what you were saying about him being like a map. It's so easy to become too comfortable and forget to pursue our spouses, the way we once did. thanks for the reminder. :)